tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3186930289760870447.post3519902970120026053..comments2023-05-18T03:00:50.326-07:00Comments on Poetry of Flesh: Poetry of Fleshhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00871932715491205605noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3186930289760870447.post-25446411439136846822009-07-31T05:11:54.544-07:002009-07-31T05:11:54.544-07:00Poetry you're not really reading this right. ...Poetry you're not really reading this right. See my comment to your July 11 post. And to the one before this.<br /><br />His problem is with your ongoing promiscuity despite his saying he wanted open, in the light of his moving to be more emotionally involved with you and your being seen by others as his girlfriend.<br /><br />You're taking it, and he's putting it, in terms of the player or predatory nature of your f*cking other men clashing with his no games style being the problem. NO. NO. No. That may be a small part but that isn't the core of it at all. <br /><br />He may be ok and get off on open where you play with other men discretely after he oks it and so on, but your just going off and picking up men openly and publicly and not discretely whatsoever, and without feeling any need to seek his approval, that's what bothered him. Your making him feel a complete lack of sexual control over your activities with others. And, as he said, that reflecting badly on him, if you're seen as his official girlfriend while doing this. I.e. it was feeling more like cuckolding to him than swinging, the way you were doing it and saying you wanted to do it.<br /><br />That was exacerbated when you talked about your feeling a compulsion to go pick up attractive new men from time to time as part of completing your social/sexual self image, due to your less popular and rather anti social HS years, etc., and college promiscuity which put you in a different popularity position at least in some ways. He called that sick at least in part because it is a classical explanation for nymphomania (much dismissed by feminists of course). <br /><br />I.e. he was reflecting on how your continuing to be non discretely promiscuous in a way that obviously wasn't at all under his control would make him both look to others, and feel to himself, as his feelings for you deepened.<br /><br />All of this conflicted in his own mind with his previously expressed desire for two way open somewhat or a lot, and so he explained his feelings in a confused way. It was the open and notorious way you showed you intended to keep going about it, completely outside his contol, that felt so bad to him. He latched on predatory and game playing. What it really was was notorious and outside his control. I can certainly see why he'd feel that way. I certainly would in any kind of two way open. <br /><br />So his solution is to keep the sex with you, lower the chances of his relationship feelings getting too strong, and to keep you from being seen as his official girlfriend.<br /><br />Swinging, particularly with a fuck buddy, is one thing. Feeling cuckolded is another.<br /><br />That's what it is Poetry.doug1noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3186930289760870447.post-53764129344495257772009-07-20T11:28:06.227-07:002009-07-20T11:28:06.227-07:00Yes, I'm just... hurt, I guess. Not overly so...Yes, I'm just... hurt, I guess. Not overly so, but just a small blow to my being, because he could not accept me as a whole. And that's such a core issue of mine, the feeling that I'll never find any one person that can understand and accept all of me.<br /><br />But at least I tried to integrate. Tried to be whole to a person, instead of an acceptable part they could understand.Poetry of Fleshhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00871932715491205605noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3186930289760870447.post-58900443746543555402009-07-19T21:03:38.808-07:002009-07-19T21:03:38.808-07:00not such a bad outcome, eh? a meeting of the mind...not such a bad outcome, eh? a meeting of the minds, if not total agreement/happiness.mauricehttp://shakespeare.mit.edu/allswell/full.htmlnoreply@blogger.com