Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Destination Unknown...

I think I'm going to take GV8 up on his offer.

I have to hammer out some things first, though.

I need to speak with my family, I need to communicate with them about what I'm going to be doing with the next year of my life, and how important it is that they support me. I know some people would think this is pathetic of me to, at my age, still be concerned with feeling supported by my parents, but that's the way it is. I'm very focused on my family, very focused on being there for them, communicating, loving, keeping healthy relationships (as healthy as they can be, given my family).

I need to hammer out the details with GV8. I need to know his expectations, need to know my salary, need to set up the initial deposit in a different way. I want a budget for wardrobe, I want to sign up for cross-fit, for krav, I need to make sure my health insurance is covered, that all writing and photography produced by me during this time belongs solely to me. I need keys to his main stores. I want to keep the laptop, iPhone, and camera that he will be purchasing for me after this is over with. I need to know the budget for parties, the guest-lists, how he wants to go through caterers, performers, DJs, etc. I need to be able to pick the location.

This means a contract. This means drawing up legal paperwork and I hate bringing that stuff into this sort of relationship, but I need to protect myself.

This is a year of my life. This is me pushing off my Master's for a year. This is me exchanging everything I've ever known and shoving off into a different world.

It's scary.

But I can do it.

I'll learn so much about myself through this.

And I'll be able to write. I'll be able to write full time.

And while I'm writing, we'll be doing LA. I'll be throwing parties, hosting events, bargaining with caterers, finding new music, new DJs, and improving myself physically, mentally, and socially. We'll be eating at all of LA's hotspots and exploring the city to its fullest.

My main concern is alienating my family. Of having them be completely against this. Of turning down their offer of going back to school.

But after this, I'll be able to pay for school. All of school. No debt. No loans. I'll have experiences that I never dreamed of.

If it works.

If not... better to burn out than to fade away.


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